Gotta take that path

So couple weeks ago I ever read a thread on twitter about autism. 
That actually autism can be detected since the pregnancy.
And the doctor who made the thread said one of the way to avoid autism baby that you should pregnant before 35 years old.

I was frozen when read that.
So that's it... end of my era. I wont be married and having any baby either. None will ever want me fo~reva.

What did I do wrong at the past until god really really hate me. Is saying sorry aint enough?
How could you change when none tell you that you did mistake?

Why I have to be a human? 
Why can I be a cat? They are cute and everyone love them.

Well gotta get use with another failure and disappointment in life. Maybe this is my path.

Forever a failure ehehe.

brb... about to cry

Last Day Being 34

And Yep!! Here we go again with a contemplation night of the year!
Same rants
Same wishes
Same issues
Same hopes

I dont know what to expect anymore. Am getting tired of let in flow. 

I wanna a different situation but currently am in trap of something.

Shud I wait or shud I make a move.

So tmrw... I will be 35 years old! So many yaaa :')
Usually I will go to mountain or went somewhere. But this year am in tight budget and have to save some money. I know I already free from car loan but I just enroll a big race which is my dream race.. UTMB CCC. aha. here you ago.

I dont know what I want in upcoming new age... the only thing that I know I need and want more money hehehe. because basically my hope still the same from previous year.

Oh also today I just done my responsibilities as the adult. Yaitu membuat SIM mobil dan motor. LOL.

Rasanya tuh kayak siap aja kalau tiba-tiba mobil atau motor diberhentiin polisi buat di razia... Am ready to show off you guys! :p

Will run Womens 10K tomorrow hopefully will be a quick morning run sesh. 
How about having a Kerastase hair treatment tomorrow? I saw it in Tiktok last night and it look sooo nice.

I feel I lose some motivation to type more in this blog. Because I just hate the way I write lately.. kayak isinaya cuman keluhan dan keluhan saja. Atuhlah elll. But sometime usually after I write I feel much much better.

I dont know what my life gonna be this year or at 35 year old me... but here are some plans (race plan to be exact :p) :
1. Run 50K at CTC Yogya (done)
2. Tiff's wedding on June at Bali! She said it will be wedding of century!!
3. Run 75K at Dieng Ultra by Detrac on June a week after Tiff's wedding
4. Chamonix baby!! on August
5. Run CCC UTMB (am freaking nervous) on September
6...... I dont know what else

Pretty sure after return from Mont Blanc my life will be pretty dry and empty and more boring hahhahahha.

Any idea what to do next? Move to  France and find rich husband there? 
Aha... dont you wish it will be easy huh? jangan mimpi kau ferguso... lol

NIGHHHTTTT

xoxo

In Between of Running Program and Corporate Slave Life

It’s actually been almost 10 years in running..since 2013 and I could tell that to stay commit and balance between work and running training it’s quite tricky. It’s not always easy and oftenly you will miss some day to run because of work, biztrip or meeting. Or might be other life experience…

But the key is as long as you plan your running a week ahead 50% of the problem are done.. I have some addiction with planning. Saya suka banget bikin planning terutama kalau weekend nanti mau kabur kemana. ahahahaha. Tapi ketika lagi fokus sama latihan road race.. kabur naik gunungnya harus ngalah dulu sama jadwal long run

Banyak yang bilang “Gw ga bisa olahraga soalnya waktu gw udah abis sama kerjaan dan commuting Llo…” tapi saya selalu jawab… “Satu hari ada 24 jam.. dan olahraga itu cuman butuh minimal 30 menit kok…”

90% mereka akan diem dan mulai mikir. Well mungkin itu buat yang baru mulai olahraga, wakti 30-45 menit itu cukup. Tapi gimana kalau udah mulai serius dan terprogram latihannya. Sisanya keukeuh ga bisa. Hehe.

Ketika saya dapet program latihan seminggu… pasti saya akan diskusi dulu sama temen saya yang buat. Misalkan hari Jumat saya ada biztrip jadi jadwal hari Jumat mostly easy/rest. Dan dihari Sabtu akan dibuat medium run. Jadwal speed pun biasanya di hari Selasa/Kamis. 

Ok bismillah coba saya buat ya tips nya hehehhe…

Cara Membagi Waktu Latihan Lari Bagi Budak Korporat :p

1. Buat planning selama seminggu di google calendar. Am a huge fans of Google tools since 5 years ago! Catet semua jadwal kerjaan kamu, entah itu meeting, deadline, flight time, cuti atau apapun itu. Dari situ kamu udah bisa kebayang kapan bisa masukin waktu lari kamu. Tapi misalkan dadakan tiba-tiba ga bisa lari jangan paksain jadwal lari hari selasa ke hari rabu dan dijadiin satu. Better under training instead of over training. yah ga better dua-duanya sih tapi kalo lihat damagenya lebih bahaya over training kan? 

Failure Sucks, But Lets Try Take A Look The Silver Lining Init (If I could)

No one love being lost.. but am not only lost but I feel a failure (again). No matter how perfect our plan was if it meant to be and it wont happened. Well this is the story about how I try to accept the failure and to calm down the inner impostor.

Heheheh not being extra but just being honest what I felt. Kinda overwhelmed with the sadness and overthink about what people will thought but I try to stay inline and focusing myself. But I always believe that whatever happened yesterday it's actually already the fate that I have to accept.

So I just DNF (Did Not Finish) on National Championship for trail running. Despite I was feel so good on first kilometer and quite confident about the run and my training. I was missed calculating the humidity and heat. It's totally the major factor in this race. I never a big fond of heat so at the first climb I am totally full of sweat. Try to consistent with the fueling every 45-50 minutes to have my gel and drink. I felt so thirsty during the climb. It was soo humid like the most humid run that I ever had.

I passed the first water station and refill the isotonic. few moments later catch some runners on the climb and get the vertical speed back. but the humidity getting higher and I try to sip more water on my flask. I also bring my coke since usually I got the sugar rush after sipped it. Those things helped me alot. But never thought that my water will run out so quick (it never happened in any race before). I saw there is a box with bottle water and empty bottles everywhere. Seemed the committee put there for addition water for runners but only a box and none on it. It become bottle plastic trash everywhere (hopefully they will clean it after all). And after I saw it suddenly I really-really need water. I scanned the empty bottle to check out if the runners left some. And sadly every bottle was empty. But what more sad was they feel OK to left the bottle inside the jungle. Oh in contrary there is a rule that we are not allow to received help from outside but OK to threw bottle / littering.  

Road Trippin’ Alone to Wonosobo

Last year in October 2021, I put another check list on my wishlist. Driving alone all by myself far enough. Actually I dont like the idea of driving alone. But due to Covid-19 Situation and during the pandemic, I get used with driving alone. Surething I love company but for safety situation and condition I choose to be going alone.

Remember on my last post I visited Lawu with Siksorogo friends from Solo. I made friend with some of them and he loves my idea to clim Sumbing Sindoro. Because I REALLLY REALLLLLYY wanna go there. So I took my day off and drive to Wonosobo but before that I had to picked up my friend, Yurin, at Salatiga.

Since none at home at that time, I had to putted my cats at petshop. So I can drive peacefully. 

I left my home around 9am after make sure everything safe and good. On 12pm I already arrived at Cipali toll (around 250km). I stopped at nearby Rest Area because I was really hungry. If you ever drive in Cipali toll you will understand how bored the road. The only things that I could do only was singing a long so I put karaoke and old school playlist on my Spotify.

And on 5pm I arrived at Salatiga, Yurin’s home. I stayed at his home for a night and drive to Wonosobo at 3am. We arrived at Garung Basecamp at 4am and start hike on 4.30am. It was still dark and cold, the basecamp gate not open yet but we keep continue to hike.

We reached first pos at 5.30 and the sun almost rise. Back at that day I was not in good shape ahahah… My was hardly ever run and do the long run.. but I still went to trail but only at Sentul for a easy 10-15k. And sometimes went to Bandung, climbing and bit have fun. The point is I was less motivated, because it was lockdown and almost no offline race (I dont really fance virtual race).